The Liminalist # 141: Icarus’s Story (Chronicles of a False Awakening # 1)

First in a new series of podcast explorations of the pseudo-awakening period of “being the One” (2000-2003), podcast update, the give & take of audience participation, books for 2018, saturation point, what is awakening?, examining the past, sticking to the facts, the purpose of being unenlightened, the splinter in the brain, premature answers, enlightenment or apotheosis, the life of the luminosity, Castaneda & Strieber quasi-mythic narratives, visionary dreams, indistinguishable from the infinite, an übermensch-ian model of transformation, the encroachment of material reality, the armor of belief, Icarus & melted wax, indescribable forces, splicing with Hollywood, a fickle god, 1999, the move to Guatemala, shaman apprenticeship with Mitch Fraas, publication of The Blood Poets, red pill experience, vision of brother’s death, discovering salvia divinorum, premature awakening,  losing the mind on an airplane, meeting Mike LaBurt, a psychotic break, entering into the life of the double, the towers falling, an agent of the apocalypse, The God Game, becoming a God, an invocation of Satan, the triumph of a Godman, anything I can imagine, bliss-dust, being a saint in the city, the One with a head-cold, by order of the spirits, what makes him the One, playing with fire, the question of personal gain in the apocalypse, the creative curiosity of a shaper of worlds, playing a manifestation of God on Earth, consolidating the power base, the opposite of epic.

Accompanying article: Lame Devil: Chronicles of a False Awakening, part 1 (Red Pill Madness in Guatemala)

Songs: “The Stories We Tell Ourselves” and “Magnets” by The Womb;  “Nevermore” by The Freak Fandango Orchestra; “En Paz” by Prjimo Bil; “Keep it Real” by Mark Williams; “Bellow” by Ben Carey; “когда же это было, Чайка” by смерть в летнюю полночь; “Morning Star” by Art of Flying.

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  1. Martin
    Posted January 7, 2018 at 7:40 am | Permalink

    I’m sorry all this happened to you Jasun.

    • Jasun
      Posted January 7, 2018 at 8:44 am | Permalink

      I’m not.

      • Jasun
        Posted January 11, 2018 at 9:10 pm | Permalink

        since martin j. clarified his comment over at the blog, I’ll clarify mine: I’m not sorry that I went though this process of de-rail-ment in 2000-2003; that it was ever necessary is another matter, still beyond my reach. “Jake” was certainly unaware of the wounds that drove him…. This is all part of his/my/our healing

  2. lawnspeak
    Posted January 11, 2018 at 6:11 am | Permalink

    45.58 mins into the seesion we hear this has a very completed feel, circular , open , post gathering quality. Perhaps its from a distant soundtrack of a movie scene after a crash or aftermath of a lifestyle. It empties regret with a kind timid glow and has its own inner reception. It is a great key for orchestral intrumentals ..its reminiscent of Let it Grow by clapton recorded analogue in the 70,s in California..with sythn a blessing to eerie times and maybe a lack of Nordic remedies ….

    • Jasun
      Posted January 11, 2018 at 8:36 am | Permalink

      yes that primo bill, a short intro to the song, which continues later.

  3. Posted January 11, 2018 at 1:50 pm | Permalink

    Thanks Mark, Steven and Kevin. Listening to the Liminalist has become a regular part of my weekly routine, this will be a sad change, but I understand the need to prioritize time. Will contribute when able.

    • Jasun
      Posted January 11, 2018 at 9:08 pm | Permalink

      you may have lucked out as creative obsession trumps business sense….

  4. Perun
    Posted January 11, 2018 at 8:49 pm | Permalink

    Thank you for sharing this Jasun. Just hearing the contrast in your manner of speech is remarkable. I was first drawn to you due to your very measured and skeptical approach. It’s hard to believe that the voice on tape is coming from the same man, which makes it all the more fascinating to me.

    • Jasun
      Posted January 11, 2018 at 9:07 pm | Permalink

      hard to believe indeed; glad you are finding something of interest… this may be the most challenging “stunt” i have yet attempted….

  5. Travis
    Posted January 12, 2018 at 4:53 pm | Permalink

    I think there is something in the tao te ching about doing your work without a thought of getting somewhere, or rewarded for it. Then you will find the joy of your existance. Nice.

    I’ll just make it up with a sweet sounding guess;
    Released from the tyranny of thinking we become balanced in the way

    • Travis
      Posted January 12, 2018 at 5:00 pm | Permalink

      And i really do, mostly, live that. And I truly am more joyful since I have stopped seeking my ideas.
      This is getting corney, but we certainly do hold the keys of our disconent with existance.

  6. Page
    Posted January 16, 2018 at 9:17 am | Permalink

    Is Mike LaBurt aware of this current side project? It would be interesting to hear a conversation between the two of you, looking back at that time, seeing as how he was the instigator of “the god game”.

    I’ve enjoyed listening to the past two recordings. Great production work, as usual. Donation coming you way. Do you take bitcoin?

    It’s easy to envision some sort of “waking life” style of animation of Jake paired-up with with these old audio meanderings.

    • Jasun
      Posted January 16, 2018 at 11:03 am | Permalink

      I will forward this to Mike; we spoke a few days before I began this project, “coincidentally” (it was also his birthday, tho I didn’t know it till he told me).

      FYI, he didn’t instigate the God Game, that was my id; what he did was redirect it into something else, the One project. It’s a natural temptation for me to want to “blame” Mike for the whole thing coming off the rails as it did. But that would be naive. He catalyzed the catalyzer and so gave Jake e a taste of my his medicine.

      Anyhow, glad you are enjoying this, it means a lot to hear it. & no, we don’t take bitcoin as yet. Not averse to it, tho I did hear that it’s time to be selling, not buying.

  7. JuanJulioJamirez
    Posted January 21, 2018 at 4:27 am | Permalink

    Narcissists are dangerous to know. Such self obsession, mental microscopy, delusions of grandeur. Quite brave laying it all out there. Refreshingly different

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